According to What Is Resilience? Your Guide to Facing Life’s Challenges, Adversities, and Crise, below is a definition of resilience.
“Resilience is the ability to withstand adversity and bounce back from difficult life events”
The general strategy for being resilient is to reframe the situation and move forward by building on existing strengths (reframe and rebuild).
Below are suggestions to be resilient based on your saboteur.
Avoider : Accept the situation
In general, avoiders are ignoring the realities. Before moving forward, avoiders need to have clarity on the current situation.
Controller : Loosen the grip
Controllers have preference in sticking to their plans. If the reality is different from their expectations, they tend to try to control harder. To move forward, they need to explore alternatives, e.g. what a wild idea a person can try.
Hyper-Achiever : Less attachment to results
Hyper-achievers emphasize performance more than other factors, e.g. learning, relationships. To move forward, they need to wear different lens, e.g. wide-angle lens
Hyper-Rational : Avoid black and white thinking
Hyper-rationals see the world using logic. This tendency compels hyper-rational people to be harsh, including themselves. To move forward, they need to see new possibilities, e.g. shades of color.
Hyper-Vigilant : Have faith in self
Hyper-vigilants constantly worry about possible dangers. They are afraid to make new moves. To move forward, they need to see new hope in themselves.
Judge : More discernment
We judge when we assume something based on our perceptions. To move forward, see the situation as it is.
Pleaser : Lift the level of self to the level to others
Pleasers usually ignore the needs of themselves. To help themselves, they need to value themselves just like the others.
Restless : Focus on strategic areas
Restless rarely focus on one area for an extended period. During difficult periods, they switch strategies too often. To move forward, they need to decide which few areas are strategic and commit to improving these areas.
Stickler : More empathetic to self
Sticklers take pride in their perfectionism. When the situation is not perfect, they are stuck. To move forward, they need to be more empathetic toward themselves, e.g. more patient during the learning period.
Victim : Take back the control
Victims see themselves as powerless. To move forward, they need to forgive themselves and find strengths in themselves.
If you are not sure of your top 3 saboteurs, check out Saboteur Test.
To shift from negative emotions to sage powers, review this video Mental Fitness – with Shirzad Chamine.